WHUT.

[chibi_trillian]

When the zombie apocalypse comes...




It's a chainsaw. ON A TEN FOOT POLE. I think I died a little from joy when I saw it.

In other news, I have written nothing (with the exception of my op_exchange fic) in weeks. THAT'S GOING TO CHANGE, GODDAMMIT. I've got a shitload of holidays this month, so hopefully I'll have the time to get my write on and do the fics I owe Kaja and dethorats, to start.

...though I was horribly tempted to write "The Adventures of Strap-On Nami, Robin the Sexecutioner, and Mistress Kaya" earlier today. No, I didn't cut my anime teeth on Bakuretsu Hunters. AT ALL.

Except I'd want to make it like a sentai show, and that wouldn't work at ALL. The last thing we need is the girls doing a Supa Combo Sexy Strap-On Attack on Mr. Prince and his army of Dirty Useless Boys (DUB for short)...okay, there's only three of them, but they eat and make enough noise for an army. Worst villains EVER.

Pimp Chopper could be like the Charlie to their Angels. It'd be great. Wait...NO IT WOULDN'T. ARG. *beats brains out on pavement*

Besides, there's probably a doujinshi just like that somewhere already.

Comments

[creamy-twilight.livejournal.com]

DUDE! You should SO write that! I would die happy if you wrote "The Adventures of Strap-On Nami, Robin the Sexecutioner, and Mistress Kaya".

And Chopper looks like he'd make a great pimp, like he'd be the leader of the pimp chain. Real pimps wear pink \o/

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

I think I'd have to shoot myself for writing something so cracktastic. Even if the idea of Kaya as a Tira-type character is entertaining as hell and more than a little appealing (I'm certain it would get the thumbs-up from Usopp, after he recovered from the massive brain hemmorhage it would cause).

[mettathron.livejournal.com]

You're not allowed to not-write that until you've written the damn MaC crossover! I'm holding that picture for ransom and will not color it until you write. It will never be finished unless you write it.

And get on MSN, damnit.

[creamy-twilight.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor plot bunny shot down in it's prime.

[bastardlady.livejournal.com]

I...
I just...
Ohgawd.

*craves your depravity*
*craves it HARD*
*WITH MAYBE SOME CHAINSAW ON THE SIDE*

[factorielle.livejournal.com]

You provide the best crack ever.

And now I'm grinning stupidly and people at work are going to wonder why EANs make me so happy. >_>

[darylchan.livejournal.com]

I've seen that chainsaw thing up close. They're pretty nifty. :D

[noodle6680.livejournal.com]

Cuts Limbs Up To 15 Feet High!

...in case a kid is stuck in a tall tree?



You'll hear a faint whispering in your ear as you sleep saying 'Strap on Nami.. Strap on Naaa~aaami!.. Write it! WRITE IT!!'

It wont be me, I swear.

[wendytigges.livejournal.com]

Hell yeah! Bring on teh zombies!!! *loves on hard*

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

Really? Judging from tree-based performance, would it be effective against zombies? *_*

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

YOU DON'T WANT MY DEPRAVITY. THAT IDEA OCCURRED TO ME AT WORK AND I HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM TO GIGGLE ABOUT IT BEFORE MY BOSS ASKED ME WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH ME.

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

No, dear. Certain suburbanites have this obsession with trees being "the right shape" and "convenient." So they prune them regularly. I like my zombie-killing idea better.

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

Seriously. Home Depot. Few entrances, few windows, full of weapons (the Garden section alone is a wonderland of zombie-killing devices), easily reinforced into a veritable castle thanks to building supplies already on site. All you'd need from the outside would be food and gasoline for the generators. If you managed to capture a grocery store or a wholesale store (especially one like BJs, where it often has its own gas pumps) and hold both of them in a safe manner, you could theoretically hole up for months, long enough to come up with a solution to the ravening zombie horde.

...no, I haven't had extensive conversations with my friends about this. AT ALL. >>;

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

ARG, NO I DON'T. IT SHOULD NOT BEEEEEEEEE!

[noodle6680.livejournal.com]

Trees? Convinient? Hmmm....

DO IT~~ DO IT!

[darylchan.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Well, it did work well on the dead tree branches we were using it on, so it obviously cuts dead things quite well. Plus you can detach it from its pole, so you've actually got two weapons in one. So I would go with yes. :D

(By the way...my friend sent me this...rather risque picture of the oh-so-sexy freak in your icon there. Want it? :D)

[wendytigges.livejournal.com]

Hmm... I think it's better to stay on the run with a small group of people you trust. sleep on high buildings with a destroyed staicase. Staying in one place would lure more zombies. Noisy garden devices also lure zombies and they have a finite power source. (I have that cool book 'the zombie survival guide' XD)

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

...

...Why the hell not.

[darylchan.livejournal.com]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v61/Izumi/raepcx2.jpg

He's posing for the camera. Enjoy. :3

[darylchan.livejournal.com]

...What the hell. That so did not work the first time. o_O

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v61/Izumi/raepcx2.jpg

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

............that really should not be as hot as it is. I mean, zombie rape and all. WTF.

[chibi-trillian.livejournal.com]

Running is also an option, if the zombies have not surrounded your area. Unfortunately, cars also have finite power sources and make sufficient noise to attract zombies, along with being a big shiny moving thing obviously operated by a non-zombie--dinner in a can. And unless you can capture a tank, a tractor-trailer, or an armored truck, cars are easily defeated by a moderately-sized group of zombies.

Tank Pros:
-Weapon!
-Heavily armored, intended to be proof against humans on the outside.
-Capable of going offroad.

Tank Cons:
-Requires specialized knowledge to operate.
-Hard to find.
-Hard to capture.
-Low passenger capacity.
-Cannot be operated solo.
-Poor gas mileage.
-Slow.

Armored Truck Pros:
-Easy to drive.
-Windows and outside of truck designed to be bomb-proof.
-Usually has money in it.
-Has large storage space for food/weapons/friends.

Armored Truck Cons:
-Hard to capture.
-Heavy vehicle, prone to rollovers.
-No much good for bludgeoning through zombies--may become mired.
-Hard to capture.
-Poor gas mileage.

Tractor Trailer Pros:
-Thanks to enormous gas tank, can travel extremely long distances on one tank of diesel fuel.
-High windows.
-Very large vehicle, capable of mowing through moderate-sized hordes of zombies handily.
-Common.

Tractor Trailer Cons:
-Requires specialized knowledge to drive, though finding a friendly trucker is easier than finding a friendly tank operator.
-Has braking issues when running bobcat (no trailer), capable of jackknifing during sudden maneuvers if trailer is still attached.
-Not armored.
-Limited passenger capacity within vehicle itself, trailer is not armored or particularly secure if passengers are kept within.

Holing up in one place also has its disadvantages, of course:
-Mantaining a proper power structure with a sizable group of panicky and possibly mutinous people can be difficult, especially if you are not physically imposing.
-Rationing resources from the start, as you don't know how long you're going to be there or when you'll get more.
-Fortifying one's holdings and acquiring new ones is difficult when there are zombies roaming about.
-The probability of being forced to defend yourself from attacks from other humans with the same bright idea as you who just didn't happen to pick as good a spot. The area would become a series of stretches of zombie-infested wasteland with miniature fortified kingdoms set up in certain shopping centers and wherever there is an easily defensible structure.

I think zombie strategy will have to depend on variety, location, and prevalence of zombies. Smart zombies roving in small packs, I'd probably run from. Dumb zombies in enormous quantities, I'd hole up and wait them out.

ZOMBIES!